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27 June 2005

Time for some happiness

So the world can seem kind of depressing from time to time.

It can seem kind of depressing when you're faced with the prospect of 12 more years of war. It can seem kind of depressing when our leaders work to divide us. It can seem kind of depressing when you see what's really going on around the world.

So I have decided, with all the power given to me as a blogger, that today you shall laugh for at least a few minutes. This has absolutely nothing to do with Senator Russ Feingold, or politics, or really anything at all. It's just time for some happiness.

Enjoy.

I realize some people have different tastes in humor, so if any of this isn't funny to you, well, go on and find some other joke page. 'Cause you really do need to laugh every once and a while.

From one of my favorite joke pages (some formatting changed)...

One day, in the Smith household, Mrs Smith turned to her husband and asked if he thought it would rain that afternoon. Mr Smith replied "of course not", whereupon their Russian friend Rudolph interrupted, saying "I am sorry, but you are wrong. It will rain heavily". Said Mrs Smith to her husband, "Oh no ... Rudolph the Red Knows Rain, Dear."
A traveller from the city takes a trip in the country by car and drives over a hare. The man is horrified to having killed a creature, looks at the hare and tears run down his face. A farmer stops by takes in the picture, puts his hand an the mans shoulder and consoles him:
"Well fix this up in no time". he turns to his truck, brings out a spray can and sprays all over the hare.
"What will that do" inquires the traveller.
"You just watch and see" replies the farmer.
After a little while the hare shivers, then shakes, jumps up, ducks under the fence, turns and waves with a front-foot at them. He runs a bit further, turns and waves again. And so it went until he disappeared over the hill-top. The traveller just cannot believe what he has just seen.
"What on earth is in that can" he wants to know.
"Well" replied the farmer "Nothing special. Hair restorer with permanent wave"
A certain pub had a pet cat that was loved by all the patrons. One day the cat died and the whole pub was so sad the barman thought he had to do something to cheer up the customers. So he cut off the tail of the cat, had it properly stuffed and mounted over the bar as a sort of momento to cheer everyone up (yes, I know, it doesn't meake sense , but we are talking about england!). Everyone liked the idea of seeing this tail in a glass case that reminded them of happier days. So far so good.
One night AFTER closing time (big HINT necessary to understand the joke) the barman was clearing up when he saw a frightening sight: the ghostly appearance of the cat who had died, but without its tail.
Of course the cat's ghost explained that he could not go to the great cat paradise in the sky without his tail! The barman looked very sad, pointed at a notice on the wall and said
" I am truly sorry, but I am afraid that after closing time we cannot retail spirits after midnight!"
Oooh, there's a lot more where that came from. Check out that page. Good stuff.

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